Wishes About Death

I wish to have no wishes left,
But to leave all to Thee;
And yet I wish that Thou shouldst will
Things that I wish should be.

And these two wills I feel within,
When on my death I muse:
But, Lord! I have a death to die,
And not a death to choose.

Why should I choose? for in Thy love
Most surely I descry
A gentler death than I myself
Should dare to ask to die.

But Thou wilt not disdain to hear
What those few wishes are,
Which I abandon to Thy love,
And to Thy wiser care.

Triumphant death I would not ask,
Rather would deprecate;
For dying souls deceive themselves
Soonest when most elate.

All graces I would crave to have
Calmly absorbed in one,
A perfect sorrow for my sins,
And duties left undone.

I would the light oi reason, Lord!
Up to the last might shine,
That my own hands might hold my soul
Until it passed to Thine.

And I would pass in silence, Lord!
No brave words on my lips,
Lest pride should cloud my soul, and I
Should die in the eclipse.

But when, and where, and by what pain,
All this is one to me
I only long for such a death
As most shall honor Thee.

Long life dismays me, by the sense
Of my own weakness scared:
And by Thy grace a sudden death
Need not be unprepared.

One wish is hard to be unwished, -
That I at last might die
Of grief for having wronged with sin
Thy spotless Majesty.