Bonnie Jim Campbell: A Legislative Memory

Bonnie Jim Campbell rode up the glen,
But it wasn't to meet the butterine men;
It wasn't Phil Armour he wanted to see,
Nor Haines nor Crafts--though their friend was he.
Jim Campbell was guileless as man could be--
No fraud in his heart had he;
'Twas all on account of his character's sake
That he sought that distant Wisconsin lake.

* * *

Bonnie Jim Campbell came riding home,
And now he sits in the rural gloam;
A tear steals furtively down his nose
As salt as the river that yonder flows;
To the setting sun and the rising moon
He plaintively warbles the good old tune:

"Of all the drinks that ever were made--
From sherbet to circus lemonade--
Not one's so healthy and sweet, I vow,
As the rich, thick cream of the Elgin cow!
Oh, that she were here to enliven the scene,
Right merry would be our hearts, I ween;
Then, then again, Bob Wilbanks and I
Would take it by turns and milk her dry!
We would stuff her paunch with the best of hay
And milk her a hundred times a day!"

'Tis thus that Bonnie Jim Campbell sings--
A young he-angel with sprouting wings;
He sings and he prays that Fate'll allow
Him one more whack at the Elgin cow!