The Backslider

Surely in the Lord we have
Both strength and righteousness;
Jesus mighty is to save
The sinner in distress.
Jesu's blood, on which we stay,
Cleanses us from every stain;
Takes the guilt of sin away,
Nor lets the power remain.

Why then, O my Saviour, why
(If mine indeed Thou art)
Am I thus? a sinner I,
And still unclean of heart?
Why doth sin my heart divide?
Whence this grievous tyranny,
All this hell of self and pride,
If Thou hast sprinkled me?

Did I not believe and feel
Through faith my sins forgiven?
Was I not caught up from hell,
And strangely raised to heaven?
Yes! I once could call Thee mine,
Felt my Saviour's blood applied;
Clothed in righteousness Divine,
I once was justified.

What, alas! I once have been
Nothing avails me now;
I the servant am of sin,
While to its yoke I bow:
While the love of sin remains,
Christ in me can never dwell;
Christ with Belial never reigns,
Nor mixes heaven with hell.

Can unholy actions suit
With one that is in Thee?
Jesu, Thou hast said, the fruit
Must answer to the tree:
If the tree (the heart) were good,
Evil thoughts it could not bear;
Could not be by sin subdued,
If Thou, my God, wert there.

Can the self-same fountain yield
Both bitter streams and sweet?.
In a soul by Jesus fill'd
Can Satan find a seat?
No, my Lord, I am not clean,
Am not inwardly renew'd,
Am not, (for I still can sin,)
I am not born of God.

See, I give up all at last,
My boasted gifts disclaim;
Trust no more in graces past,
But now condemn'd I am:
Nothing do I bring to Thee,
That I may Thy mercy move;
No one spark remains in me
Of faith, or hope, or love.

If but one good thought could buy
Thy grace, and heaven win,
Lord, not one good thought have I;
My all is self, and sin:
Full of guilt and misery,
Saviour, at Thy feet I fall;
See, the unbeliever see,
The sinner stript of all!

Let me never, never more
My wretched soul deceive;
Dream that I have life, before
I hear Thy voice and live:
Let me, humbled in the dust,
Wait to taste how good Thou art;
See, and feel, but never trust
My own deceitful heart.

O that I could truly wait
The dictates of Thy will;
Calmly mourn my sinful state,
Till Thou shalt say, " Be still!
The lost sheep to save I came,
The backslider to restore;
Sinners I do not condemn;
Depart, and sin no more."