Book IX, Epigram 35 (Ker)

By such arts as these, Philomusus, you always earn your dinner: you invent much and retail it as truth. You know what counsel Pacorus takes in his Arsacian palace; you estimate the Rhenish and Sarmatian armies; the orders of Dacia's commander, committed to despatches, you unseal; victory's laurel ere it arrives you see; you know how often dusky Syene is drenched by Egypt's showers; you know how many ships set sail from Libya s shore; for who e brow are growing Julian olives, for whom Heaven's father designs his chaplets. A truce to your arts! To-day you shall dine at my house on this condition, Philomusus, that you tell me no news!