Book II, Epigram 41 (Ker)

"Laugh, if you are wise, O girl, laugh," the Pelignian bard, I think, said. But he did not say it to all girls. However, granted he said it to all girls, he did not say it to you: you are not a girl, and you have three teeth, Maximina, but they are altogether of the hue of pitch or boxwood. So, if you trust your mirror and me, you ought to dread laughing as much as Spanius dreads a breeze, and Priscus the touch of a hand; as' much as pearlpowdered Fabulla dreads a shower, white-leaded Sabella dreads the sun. Do you put on an aspect more grave than that of Priam's. spouse and of his eldest son's wife. Avoid the mimes of laughtermoving Philistion, and revelries of looser kind, and anything that by witty wantonness unseals the lips in manifest laughter. You should rightly sit by some sorrowing mother, or by one who weeps for her husband or loving brother, and you should be free only for the tragic Muse. Nay, follow my advice, and weep, if you are wise, O girl, weep.