The Moon's Elegy

I wonder why I am the moon?

My God! What are my sins?
Why is my misery so great,

Why must from pain I vince?
I'd rather be earth's humblest slave,

Than here proud king of night,
On earth in sandals walk, than here

In boots, spurred like a knight.
I'd rather smell the barroom's breath,

Than starry flowers scent;
Is there a good man who does not

O'er my sad fate lament?
Each dog, each poet barks at me-

These rhyming whittlers e'en
Think, out of sympathy with them

I am so pale-faced seen.
I, sympathize with them, whose heart

Is unmoved, but whose ears
Move to the tune of doggerel verse

One from these fellows hears?
'Tis true, I am pale faced, howe'er

I am not so from woe!
It is from wrothful ire, because

Those foolish chumps below-
Dare kinship claim, and look on me

As were they chums of mine.
And with them I would be engaged

In guarding herds of swine.
Once in a while I truly hear

A God-born son of song.
And blissfully I list to lays

Which rise from passions strong.
But until one such minstrel sings.

What winnings must I hear!
And how these poetasters thrive,

And how they persevere
To mew and blab! At evenings I

Do actually fear
To rise because their screeching song-
Is sure to reach my ear.
Just as I thought! There 's one right here!

Look at him! How he sprawls,
See-saws the air! He thinks he sings,

In truth he only bawls.
He sighs as does some gipsy lad

Who just had come to grief,
I wonder if his moans and groans

Bring him any relief?
What things he talks! Constantly asks

That I should look and see
What does just now his sweetheart do?

All right! I grant his plea.
Well then, your sweetheart just now crawls

Out of the oven door,
Brings forth the baked potatoes which

She had put in before.
She eagerly bites into one

Oh! what a face she makes!
She burned her lips, her yell and howl

All of the household wakes!
O! What a face! well you deserve

To have such just a belle!
Now, having told you what she does

There 's but one thing to tell:
Pray, sing no more, but sneak away

And go, yes, go to hell.